Thursday, August 18, 2011

who am I, really, lately?

lately I am a girl who
  • cannot sleep when she wants
  • wishes for things that are too out of reach
  • wants the past to come back
  • is lonely
  • feels the need to change her style
  • hasn't found herself fully
  • can't wait for the beginning of the school year
  • is unhappy with the present
  • needs to get a life, really.
  • spends too much time alone at the park
  • ignores her family with books
  • expects people to care about her even with her lack of trying after failing
I can't help but feel lost really.
That's isn't me.
That is not who I want to know.
That's not how I want to describe myself.

But it is me.
I am the only one who can change that.
What a sad thing,
holding my life in my hands,
and letting them get dirty.
Letting those same hands get chopped up and abused.

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